Uterus that is.
This may not be a popular blog post, but I'm not in a popular mood so whatever!
I am pro-choice, which is not to be mistaken for pro-abortion. I truely think that it is none of my business what someone does with their uterus. Do I think abortion should be used at birth control...no, not at all (I do believe that after 2 for non medical reasons people should be put on long lasting birth control, but that is just a thought). Do I think that it is sad, yes, sad for the life that will never be, sad for the life of a woman that will be forever changed and sad for all of the childless people out there who would give an arm or a leg to have just 1 baby. But I am not perfect and should not condem other. If there is a higher power who condems such things, it is his/her job to do so, not mine.
Now, that being said, there are a lot of pro-choice people who condemed Michelle Duggar for being pregnant with her 20th baby. Really? Really? Pretty sure she is making a choice about her body (just maybe not the choice you or I would have made). *I* would never want 20 children (nor would my body handle that, really gotta give her props for it!) but it's her uterus, not mine and if she wants to give birth to another 20, I'm not gonna judge. Her and her husband take care of their children, they appear well fed, polite, and are not being raised with the help of any government assitance, so literally her having another baby costs me nothing. Sadly she lost that baby and as many of my friends know, losing a baby is a horrible, senseless thing. There are some who said she should take that as a sign to stop. Again, not my place to tell her what to do with her uterus!
I have friends who are both pro-life and pro-choice and I love them all and either way, I try not to judge them, because it is not my place to judge anyone, I'm jsut here to be a friend.
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Thursday, December 1, 2011
My Dream Come True, My Cody
I am a bit behind, but being the mom of 3 boys will do that to a person. The school year has started, Cody has started Scouts once again and Shane has started Wrestling, and Casey, my sweet baby, is already 6 months old and still stealing our hearts. As promised, this blog is about my Cody.
When I got pregnant with Cody, I was not planning it, so he was a surprise, a VERY welcomed surprise. I had been in a bit of a funk before I found out. I was worried that after only a few months of dating, I was pregnant, what would Randy think. Randy welcomed the news of a baby, which was a relief. I was cautiously happy. Having lost one child already I was scared to attach to a baby that I may lose. Randy was not Christopher's father so he could not understand the feelings I was having. I would not buy anything, talk about a shower, look at baby furniture until I had my level 2 ultrasound to find out everything was ok with this baby. And it was. Everything was right on track, I was having a healthy baby (we didn't want to find out the sex, we like the surprise)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I was induced on December 19th, 2003, we had a party in my room, my mom, stepmom, Randy's, many friends and both my brothers (they were in their teens back then and it was the perfect sex ed class for them...the reasons to wrap your rascal!) Cody was out after 12 hours of induction and just 16 minutes of pushing. They placed him on my chest and I was finally a mom. I was in love.
He was a mini version of me, a little clone. My mother couldn't believe it, it was uncanny how much he looked like me. She said, minus the penis, he was me!
He was the 1st great-grandbaby in several year for my Bama and Poppop and you would have thought the moon and sun set on Cody according to my Bama. She loved that little boy beyond words. He was such a happy baby, smiles for anyone, went to anyone, no stranger anxiety for him. He slept through the night at 6 weeks. He hardly ever cried, in fact my family asked me if a doctor had looked at him because it couldn't be normal to have such a happy child all the time.
I like to say he was my light, as he brightened my world and proved to me and many doctors that I could have a healthy baby. He was sunshine after years of storms. He was my dream come true. He was a good toddler, I never really dealt with the terrible 2's or 3's.
As he entered preschool it became apparent that he was what the teachers called 'emotionally immature.' He cried when things got him upset, he had meltdowns over the slightest things and was behind academically, but they all assured me he would grow out of it, that sometimes boys are a bit slow to mature.
He started Kindergarten and was tested and found to be behind academically so they offered a program called Extended Day Kindergarten where he went to his regular AM class and stayed in the afternoon for a smaller class to work on the stuff they did in the morning. I thought this would be the answer to all of his problems, if he could just catch up to his peers and mature a little all would be right in his world.
That was not the case. He caught up and was set for 1st grade and I even warned his 1st grade teacher that he was a bit of a cry baby. I think she thought I was some bitch of a mom, because at 1st she only saw a sweet boy who tried so hard. Then the honeymoon period ended and Cody started to have his meltdowns for her. We decided it was time for him to see someone to work out his issues. Thankfully I have great insurance that covers his sessions (less a $15 co pay) and a therapist who he likes a lot. At the end of the school year his teacher and I were talking about him and that his behavior is not just immaturity. Due to laws and other bureaucratic bullshit she couldn't say more, but I understood the unspoken.
Now we are in 2nd grade and things are not getting better, if anything worse. His grades are slipping, yet his teacher tells me he can get the info with 1 on 1 assistance. His emotional outbursts are becoming more and more of an issue. So I have taken the next step to have him evaluated by a neurologist (my neurologist) for ADD and what ever else she finds. I am also working on getting him an IEP to get him the consistent help he needs. He has trouble expressing his emotions correctly which we are working with his counselor with.
So those are the challenges with Cody.........but they do not define him. He is a great big brother, he loves Casey and will make silly baby noises for him. He is a hugger..his teacher can count on a hug everyday from Cody, he is caring. He still will sit on my lap just to be close to me. He loves animals, much like his parents. He reads grade levels above him and LOVES books.
All of his quirks, as I like to call them, make him Cody. They make the bad days bad and the good days even better because they are cherished that much more.
I am a mom because of Cody and I hope when he grows up he thinks he had a great mom!
When I got pregnant with Cody, I was not planning it, so he was a surprise, a VERY welcomed surprise. I had been in a bit of a funk before I found out. I was worried that after only a few months of dating, I was pregnant, what would Randy think. Randy welcomed the news of a baby, which was a relief. I was cautiously happy. Having lost one child already I was scared to attach to a baby that I may lose. Randy was not Christopher's father so he could not understand the feelings I was having. I would not buy anything, talk about a shower, look at baby furniture until I had my level 2 ultrasound to find out everything was ok with this baby. And it was. Everything was right on track, I was having a healthy baby (we didn't want to find out the sex, we like the surprise)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I was induced on December 19th, 2003, we had a party in my room, my mom, stepmom, Randy's, many friends and both my brothers (they were in their teens back then and it was the perfect sex ed class for them...the reasons to wrap your rascal!) Cody was out after 12 hours of induction and just 16 minutes of pushing. They placed him on my chest and I was finally a mom. I was in love.
He was a mini version of me, a little clone. My mother couldn't believe it, it was uncanny how much he looked like me. She said, minus the penis, he was me!
He was the 1st great-grandbaby in several year for my Bama and Poppop and you would have thought the moon and sun set on Cody according to my Bama. She loved that little boy beyond words. He was such a happy baby, smiles for anyone, went to anyone, no stranger anxiety for him. He slept through the night at 6 weeks. He hardly ever cried, in fact my family asked me if a doctor had looked at him because it couldn't be normal to have such a happy child all the time.
I like to say he was my light, as he brightened my world and proved to me and many doctors that I could have a healthy baby. He was sunshine after years of storms. He was my dream come true. He was a good toddler, I never really dealt with the terrible 2's or 3's.
As he entered preschool it became apparent that he was what the teachers called 'emotionally immature.' He cried when things got him upset, he had meltdowns over the slightest things and was behind academically, but they all assured me he would grow out of it, that sometimes boys are a bit slow to mature.
He started Kindergarten and was tested and found to be behind academically so they offered a program called Extended Day Kindergarten where he went to his regular AM class and stayed in the afternoon for a smaller class to work on the stuff they did in the morning. I thought this would be the answer to all of his problems, if he could just catch up to his peers and mature a little all would be right in his world.
That was not the case. He caught up and was set for 1st grade and I even warned his 1st grade teacher that he was a bit of a cry baby. I think she thought I was some bitch of a mom, because at 1st she only saw a sweet boy who tried so hard. Then the honeymoon period ended and Cody started to have his meltdowns for her. We decided it was time for him to see someone to work out his issues. Thankfully I have great insurance that covers his sessions (less a $15 co pay) and a therapist who he likes a lot. At the end of the school year his teacher and I were talking about him and that his behavior is not just immaturity. Due to laws and other bureaucratic bullshit she couldn't say more, but I understood the unspoken.
Now we are in 2nd grade and things are not getting better, if anything worse. His grades are slipping, yet his teacher tells me he can get the info with 1 on 1 assistance. His emotional outbursts are becoming more and more of an issue. So I have taken the next step to have him evaluated by a neurologist (my neurologist) for ADD and what ever else she finds. I am also working on getting him an IEP to get him the consistent help he needs. He has trouble expressing his emotions correctly which we are working with his counselor with.
So those are the challenges with Cody.........but they do not define him. He is a great big brother, he loves Casey and will make silly baby noises for him. He is a hugger..his teacher can count on a hug everyday from Cody, he is caring. He still will sit on my lap just to be close to me. He loves animals, much like his parents. He reads grade levels above him and LOVES books.
All of his quirks, as I like to call them, make him Cody. They make the bad days bad and the good days even better because they are cherished that much more.
I am a mom because of Cody and I hope when he grows up he thinks he had a great mom!
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