That is pretty much how I feel right now, like someone sucker punched my gut this morning.
For quite some time I have felt something is wrong with Cody. He often has emotional outbursts, can't control his emotions, hasn't been bringing home good test scores. This has been clear to me since he was in pre-school, but Iwas always told it was 'emotional immaturity', he would grow out of it. But he hasn't. So about 2 years ago we started him in therapy and he was doing a little better. We worked on coping skills, "Count to 10 and start again" "Is this a big deal or a little deal" "Take a deep breath" but really we were only putting a bandaide on the steady bleed of my son's emotions.
So today we went to see a child psychiatrist and we got a diagnosis. Attention Deficit- HyperActivity disorder (ADHD), anxiety, and Asbergers (which for those who don't know is a high functioning form of Autism). While I has suspected these things, actually hearing them was a gut wrenching feeling. Hearing my son was austistic was something I did not process in her office, I smiled, nodded, told her I suspected as much, but deep down my stomach felt like it had a huge pit in it. I know things could be so much worse, I could have been getting a diagnosis of cancer for my child, or some other terrible disease, but no parent EVER wants A diagnosis, ANY diagnosis for their child.
After dropping Cody off at school I said to Randy, "I'm not sure if I am relieved we have a diagnosis and therefore a treatment, or if I want to cry because our son is not normal" His response "Who really is normal?" And while he is right, we all have 'something' life is hard enough, now for my son it will always be harder. He will always have to have meds to control his moods and anxiety, he will be labeled, he will in general have a harder time with things becuase his view of our world is a bit different.
Tonight we will start him on medication that I am hoping, praying will help him and I will do what I am trained to do as a nurse, research, research, research. The mom in me will cry today, get it out of my system and tomorrow I move one to being an advocate for my son.
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
I got that bug...you know the one that starts with M
and ends with ICKEY!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh yes, I have the Disney bug again.
In the past, this is the time I would have started planning a trip for fall of this year, sadly I'm not sure if it is in the cards for us this year. In the past we have used our tax return to pay a big chunk of the trip, but this year whatever tax return we get will go towrds paying down debt. I know a crappy way to spend money, well maybe not crappy, but unfun. I promised myself we would budget this year and stop wasting money, so that is my goal, so my date with the mouse must wait.
I have several goals for this year and I am going to post them here and will cehck in time to time to let you all (hahahaha)know how it's going.
*Loose 20lbs (40 would be great, but that would just be a ‘diet’ not changing how I am eating)
*Exercise more (not necessarily to lose weight, but to feel better)
*Get all my bills filed away and decrease the paper clutter they create (I literally have 3 years to file, but never had the time before to do)
*Get caught up on all of our bills and NOT fall behind again! (hopefully our tax return will help with this and we can start to save money by not paying late fees)
Coupon more
*Stop buying things because they are on sale without a purpose in mind (while I love saving money, I have an attic full of ‘great deals’ that have no home….not so much of a great deal now!)
*Budget better
*Get the front porch cleaned up and turned into a craft/reading room
*Start a savings fund for a new roof (exciting, I know!)
*Start a savings fund for vacation (even if it is $5 a week, that’s $20 a month and over $200 for the year!)
*Be better about mailing out B-day cards to friends and loved ones, with personal notes in them
*Go through my closet and WEED out!
In thinking about it, I should print this out so I can see it everyday and keep my goals at the front of my mind.
In fact, I am going to get off the computer and try to do something on my goal list!
In the past, this is the time I would have started planning a trip for fall of this year, sadly I'm not sure if it is in the cards for us this year. In the past we have used our tax return to pay a big chunk of the trip, but this year whatever tax return we get will go towrds paying down debt. I know a crappy way to spend money, well maybe not crappy, but unfun. I promised myself we would budget this year and stop wasting money, so that is my goal, so my date with the mouse must wait.
I have several goals for this year and I am going to post them here and will cehck in time to time to let you all (hahahaha)know how it's going.
*Loose 20lbs (40 would be great, but that would just be a ‘diet’ not changing how I am eating)
*Exercise more (not necessarily to lose weight, but to feel better)
*Get all my bills filed away and decrease the paper clutter they create (I literally have 3 years to file, but never had the time before to do)
*Get caught up on all of our bills and NOT fall behind again! (hopefully our tax return will help with this and we can start to save money by not paying late fees)
Coupon more
*Stop buying things because they are on sale without a purpose in mind (while I love saving money, I have an attic full of ‘great deals’ that have no home….not so much of a great deal now!)
*Budget better
*Get the front porch cleaned up and turned into a craft/reading room
*Start a savings fund for a new roof (exciting, I know!)
*Start a savings fund for vacation (even if it is $5 a week, that’s $20 a month and over $200 for the year!)
*Be better about mailing out B-day cards to friends and loved ones, with personal notes in them
*Go through my closet and WEED out!
In thinking about it, I should print this out so I can see it everyday and keep my goals at the front of my mind.
In fact, I am going to get off the computer and try to do something on my goal list!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)